It's not something anyone told me to do or even suggested that it might be a good idea. It sorta just seemed like a good idea that might occupy my mind with something other than drinking.
This deceptively simple prayer, which some people refer to as the AA prayer---one of two we stole from the Christian tradition---has started off most all of my days with a solid foundation. It was though only after years of daily practice, that I discovered several important truths hidden within this deceptively simple prayer. This, by the way, is a common experience of mine when I practice a new healthy behavior for prolonged periods of time!
And so the most important truth was discovered only after several years of consistent daily practice: this prayer wasn't a prayer of petition as I first thought it to be when I started hearing it in most AA meetings I attended. That is, it wasn't really prayer where I petitioned (asked) God for something I wanted, something I didn't think I had or could get under my own power.
It was only after hundreds of recitations of this seemingly simple prayer that I discovered that the Serenity Prayer is far more than a prayer of petition. It's a special kind of prayer different from all other familiar types of prayer: thanksgiving, praise, despair, etc.). Instead, it's become a unique form of prayer I call a "trick" prayer: it tricks me into a unforeseen or sought after experience of awareness where I gradually discovered that I don't get Serenity first (as a gift from God or anyone else) so that I can then accept the things I cannot change!
Instead, I repeatedly discover after the fact that only after I accept the things I cannot change---usually after a long painful process of trying to change it!---and only then, that I then experience Serenity, a sense of peace. Serenity isn't a prerequisite for acceptance of things I cannot change, it's the consequence!
I also discovered after hundreds of repetitions of this prayer that I don't get Courage first so that I can then change the things I can change. Rather, I fearfully and doubtfully change the things I can and then and only then can I look back and see the expression of a courage I didn't even know I had in me!
The Serenity Prayer has tricked me thousands of times before I discovered the subtle Wisdom hidden in this prayer.
Maybe this whole gradual awareness is a simple answer to the last request or petition made in this prayer, where we ask for "the Wisdom to know the difference" in terms of what we can and can't change. Maybe for me at least, the wisdom is discovered only through therepeated and sometimes mindless action of reciting this simple prayer.
The other important truth I've learned about this and other prayers is that I am always free to change the wording so that the prayer more adequately expresses my thoughts and feelings, my truth. I'm free to make any prayer "mine". Here are several of my favorite versions of the Serenity Prayer:
Serenity Prayer (My version):
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, wisdom to know the difference and the love to do the next right thing.
This added phrase, "and the love to do the next right thing" helps me re-enter life after this short moment of contemplative prayer and focus my attention so that I'm looking for opportunities to do the right thing, or more accurately, the loving thing.
Another version I stole (permitted and even encouraged in AA!) from someone else, the "people version":
God grant me the Serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the Courage to change the people I can and the Wisdom to know that I'm those people!
I wonder what other truths I'll discover as I continue this daily routine? Can't wait to find out. But if I do wait, I'm sure I will!
