A Quick Check-in

It's been over a month since I've posted a blog here and now as I try to get back into the groove of writing, I'm facing some sort of writer's block as I try to dip my toe back into the water.  I've got two blogs that I've been drafting but neither seems ready for publishing.  One I'll probably never post as it was done more for personal chewing through of a difficult time I was having with my wife.  It turned into something I've never really done: a fourth step with a fourth column. 

Somehow in the writing process, I ended up understanding my need to see my part in what was going on and -- all of a sudden -- her part became irrelevant.  And then everything became clear to me in terms of why I had done what I had done --- and before moving forward to make an amends with her, I spent time having some compassion/forgiveness for myself.  I'm awfully hard on myself --- and it's not helpful to be unkind, even toward one's self.

I've had titles for interesting blogs float past my mind over the past couple of weeks, but I've just not had the time to sit down and write.  They were great titles --- wish I could remember them.

I've been struggling to find some balance in all the various aspects of my life, both in terms of recovery and family/work.  Overall, I think I'm doing well --- but the blog writing has taken a real hit in terms of consistent effort and action.  Someone once told me that balance isn't a state of being, but rather, it's a brief moment in time that we pass by as we swing from one extreme to another.  The swing has slowed down much in the past eight years --- but I still seem to drift back and forth.  Guess it's better than the alternative!

I will commit to writing more in the next week.  My wife's out of town for a couple of days beginning tomorrow, so I should be able to get something out.  I tend to binge on meetings when she's away, plus have time to be with friends/sponsees and just talk about whatever.  Plus my honey-do list.

Take care!

Mike L.